Our Awesome Banyo

Ah yes, TV commercials… the main source of income of any television network. TV commercials are like co-workers: they come in different shapes and sizes, are unavoidable, and can either be pretty smart or infinitely dumb. TV commercials have been around for the longest time, probably since TV was invented (too lazy to research, don’t be an ass if I’m wrong). They may have undergone a lot of changes, but even with so much variety, there is certainly still one common goal: get the product noticed.

To get noticed, you’ll need a commercial, or maybe it’s better to describe it as a scenario in which the viewer can relate. You can almost say that commercials are like any form of media; they oftentimes reflect the trends of the era in which they were made. And it’s always fun to make fun of past trends right? Doesn’t thinking about your mom wearing shoulder pads or the popularity of Trunks’ hair back in the day give you the funnies?

With all the changes in society and hair trends throughout the years, it is no surprise that what was a “good” commercial before may be so retarded in today’s standards. There are of course some exceptions. Some of them may as well be called classics.

In this article I will present both the classics as well as the wtf-were-they-thinking types of commercials. But like in any company meeting, let’s start with the bad:

THE BAD

Coca Cola – Coke Ko ‘To

Dammit this was annoying as hell. I remember some of my friends (you know who you are) actually doing this, and even to this day, I don’t get it. Why do they have to play this stupid game just to determine who gets the bottle of coke? And by the look of things, the girl wearing white was the one who bought it. Why did she risk the ownership of her softdrink by playing this damn game? Why aren’t the girls this pretty in my campus? Too many questions…

Sunsilk – “Hair Talk”

Besides the preview image above looking like the guy has stolen a pair of used undies, this commercial is also somewhat annoying. Now I’m no female and I am a bit lacking in the hair department, but I’m just not sure how you are supposed to talk with your hair. I mean, it’s possible they are saying something else completely different right?

Alaska Milk

Good thing I wasn’t even born when this train wreck was shown. In this 55 second commercial, you’ll see how Filipinos tend to look up to whatever was foreign. It would be okay if the kid was at least Filipino or something, but here we got some white kid and Cisco Oliver speaking Filipino for some reason. Surprisingly, Cisco lost (he could have easily thrown the kid 50 yards away), and what follows is…

Cisco: “Galing mow man”

Kid: “Wow!” (Alaska must have tasted like heaven back then)

Cisco: “What’s that man?”

Kid: “Alaska, man!”

Cisco: “Masawrap?!”

Kid: “Yeaah!”

I would really like to blame it on Martial Law.

Speaking of Alaska, I still stand by my theory that the kid printed on the label was Tim Cone.

Rexona – “Everybody”

You can blame the song on the Backstreet Boys, but there is no excuse for a bunch of men using their deodorants like mics in a locker room. They also seem very happy with their roll-ons.  Last time I checked, applying deodorant was about as much fun as… applying sticky stuff on your under arms.

Palmolive – “I Can Feel It”

I know some people would consider this classic, and Alice Dixon was indeed hot when you were four… but this commercial practically screams 80’s. This may be the only soap commercial where the lady “tries” the soap by being sprayed with water while her clothes were on. I can vaguely remember some people imitating the “I can feel it” shoulder thing, ugh.

Now it’s time to look at the good stuff.

THE GOOD

McDonald’s – “First Love”

McDonald’s has always been one of the best at making commercials. In this one, a boy had some sort of puppy love with the girl (in an 80’s setting), then they grow up and the girl, now a woman, introduces to the now grown up man her husband and child. Though they had a little “something” when they were seven, they didn’t really get together. Then he eats some fries like how we all do when we reminisce a lost love.

Fita – “One Wish”

I won’t even have to spell out the hilarity of this commercial, since it pretty much drives the point home before you even know it. Its popularity led to the production of other hilarous Fita commercials which we still get to this day.

PLDT NDD – “Suportahan Taka”

I think this was one of the first “awww” commercials made.  A college student calls his father to tell him that he would like to shift to Fine Arts (pussied out from a premed course or frat initiation I assume). The father, instead of shouting profanities like what fathers in the real world would do, instead says “bakeet?” (but whyyy?), then agrees anyway before the commercial ends. During its popularity, I guess a lot of students tried to pull this kind of thing off too, only to result to their fathers having a heart attack.

Dragon Katol

Here we have a stereotype cowboy with dame who decided to live the cowboy life by sleeping in mosquito infested shacks. After slapping themselves silly, they decided to use Dragon Katol (mosquito coils, y’know, that stuff you tried to smoke in 3rd grade). “Dragon kung umusowk, lamowk siguradong teypowk”. I really think this commercial was made for us to laugh at 20 years later.

Smart – “Voice”

If I remember correctly, this was launched around Christmas last year. Although this wasn’t exactly whored out on TV, I found it to be the most uhmm… tear jerking of all. So here you’ve got a child who grew up without ever seeing his dad who was abroad. All he knew of his dad was his voice through the telephone. Dad finally comes home and the son, not recognizing him, hides away. An unnecessary phone call is made and everyone goes aww. If I were the dad I would have slapped the kid silly so he could recognize my hand as well.

McDonalds’s – Karen and Gina

I think this was the commercial that started off the string of really good commercials from McDonald’s, and is probably the most popular local commercial ever made. Here we have Karen, eating at McDonald’s with her senile grandfather. Grandpa mistakes her for his other granddaughter Gina, then what follows is well… you know the rest.

We all wish we were like Karen, who gets half cheeseburgers all the time… hell it should have its own value meal.